A LETTER TO THE GRAY HAIR NEAR MY NIPPLE

Dear Gray Hair Near My Nipple,

Dude, what the fuck is your problem?

I didn’t even see you yesterday and this morning, you almost poked my goddamn eye out while I was brushing my teeth.

Okay.

I get it.

You win.

I’m getting older.

Just stop already. Please.

And, FYI, I just approached an Orthodox Jewish kid in Starbucks and said, “Does everyone tell you a million times a day that you look exactly like Adrien Grenier from Entourage?”

To which he said, “Who’s Adrien Grenier and what’s Entourage?”

Silly wabbit, Trix are for kids.

love/thanks,
gabe

“In Live Like a Fruit Fly, Gabe Berman shares his recipe for living a more joyful, worthwhile, and abundant life in every way. A witty, entertaining, and insightful read.” — Deepak Chopra, Author, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success

www.LiveLikeAFruitFly.com

www.WhereIsGodWhenOurLovedOnesGetSick.com

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Who Watches The Watchmen?

“I heard a joke once: Man goes to doctor.

Says he’s depressed.

Says life is harsh and cruel.

Says he feels all alone in a threatening world.

Doctor says, ‘Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up.’

Man bursts into tears.

Says, ‘But doctor… I am Pagliacci.’

Good joke.

Everybody laugh.

Roll on snare drum.

Curtains.”

– Rorschach from “Watchmen”