OMGabe

by Gabe Berman – the author of Live Like a Fruit Fly

Archive for the month “July, 2016”

“Mr. Nobody”

“I’m not afraid of death. I’m afraid I haven’t been alive enough.”

I sat on the edge of my bed – totally petrified.

Not frightened, but silent and still, like stone. Mesmerized by that quote above.

I heard it at the end of a movie trailer I was watching on my phone just a moment before.

“I’m not afraid of death. I’m afraid I haven’t been alive enough.”

Those words landed in the center of the center of the bullseye so they didn’t even need to be thought about.

They just hung in the air in front of me like conspicuous Himalayan prayer flags.

But they evaporated in an instant when my eyes caught an unexpected sight in their periphery.

It was like a glitch in the Matrix.

A World War II bayonet rested beside my bed.

I felt neurons rushing to make their calculations.

Ah, yes.

My mom and sister were going through boxes of old stuff today and one of them must have left it there for me.

It was my dad’s.

He inherited from his dad who guarded Nazi prisoners with it.

They’re both dead now.

And now it’s mine.

I can’t speak for my grandfather (Abraham Berman) but when my dad (Harold Berman) got sick, he told me that he lived long enough and all he cared about at that point was his family not having to see him suffer.

How brave and beautiful and selfless.

It didn’t even occur to him to worry about suffering. His first thought, as always, was about my mom and my sister and me.

But he didn’t get his wish.

I was imprinted with his suffering. Tattooed permanently by it.

And at this point, I’m not afraid of dying either. I just hope that I (Gabriel Berman) will be alive enough to truly live.

And I hope the same for you.

with love and gratitude,
gb

If you haven’t read this yet, it’s time:
Live Like A Fruit Fly

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You Couldn’t Help It 

  
LOVE LOOKS LIKE THIS

S. Redemption 

  
love looks like this 

Gabe Proof Through The Night

Alone I sat on the beach again.

Alone I sat, but in a huge crowd, as the Fourth Of July fireworks illuminated the night sky.

And on the drive home, I thought about why we all crave to be in love.

Crave it like junkies in withdrawal.

I think it’s because being in love is the only thing that can rival the feeling of being young.

Because when you’re in love, and I mean cosmically coordinated, quantumly entangled, unconditionally expressed, star crossed love, time loses all relevance. The years behind you become a concept. An illusion.

And the present moment becomes bright and attention grabbing like it’s been filtered in Photoshop.

Of course in the car tonight, I also let myself lie naked in the center of the massive crater left behind by the absence of my dad.

If I were anymore heartbroken, I’d cease.

Totally cease.

As for right now, I’m sitting in his seat at the dining room table, listening to Kind Of Blue by Miles, and the only thing I can think to do is send him love.

I have enough, more than enough, for you as well.

with gratitude,
gb

Your loved ones will love this from you: Love Looks Like This

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