OMGabe

by Gabe Berman – the author of Live Like a Fruit Fly

Ezekiel 25:17


I did something today that I’m not so proud of.

A women told me her husband is in the hospital and I said, “Maybe you deserve it.”

I was pulling out of a parking space in front of a grocery store and this woman wanted to jam her minivan into the space next to mine.

While my car was still moving.

Not exactly very safe.

She made eye contact with me and gestured her plans with an impromptu set of hand signals.

I quickly calculated the variables of the situation and concluded that she, because she obviously didn’t learn the lesson in kindergarten, was going to have to wait her turn.

Like HAL in 2001, I read her lips as she looked on in disgusted disbelief.

She then, unmistakably, called me an asshole.

I creeped up next to her, came to a complete stop and rolled down my window.

I calmly asked, “Was this so important that you had to call me an asshole?”

She tried to defend herself but it was all subconscious code for, “My sense of entitlement dictates my thoughts and behavior.”

So I cut her off by saying, “Life is so fucking short and you had to call me an asshole because my car was still in motion when you wanted to park?”

She froze.

And then hit me with this non-sequitur, “My husband is in the hospital.”

And that’s when I delivered the line, “Maybe you deserve it.”

I got halfway down the block and considered turning around to find her in the grocery store so I could apologize.

But, upon calculating the variables, I decided to keep driving. Because if she said anything piggish to me, at all, I’d be facing manslaughter charges for beating someone to death with a loaf of Ezekiel bread.

See, the thing is, I woke up on the wrong side of the world this morning.

Sometimes that just happens. You just wake up and things just annoy you, right?

I really tried to dwell on gratefulness when I caught myself feeling this way though. But then this happened. It’s really not the end of the world, but our lives are inhabited by mindless, greedy zombies and sometimes I’m just sick of it.

And I really can hate this woman as much as I hate bible thumping republicans or a decapitating terrorists. Because they’re all the same. It’s just a difference of degree.

But as I sit here in Starbucks, removed from the situation, the lens zooms out and I can see more of the picture. The thing is, I’m the same as well. It’s just a difference of degree.

And we’re all doing the best we can in the moment. The best is far from good enough if it hurts others, but it’s still the best.

So, as always, it’s up to people like you and I to remember that we’re all connected so we can be the rare ones to make the higher choices.

I just need to keep reminding myself that good prevails.

thank you,
gabe

www.WhereIsGodWhenOurLovedOnesGetSick.com

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5 thoughts on “Ezekiel 25:17

  1. I just spit out my coffee laughing over the Ezekiel Bread comment. Thank you. It’s been a week for me as well. Dealing with incompetence and lack of caring, and anger when loved ones get sick. Chalk one up for another inspiring read by you.

  2. Sometimes, well often, maybe a lot, I do or say things I wish I wouldn’t have. I wonder to this day the ramifications of the actions of my past? Every once in a while I’ll get an email from someone I met 30 years ago telling me how one sentence I didn’t even remember saying changed their life in an awesome way and they are still feeling it 30 years later.

    I wonder then … about the sentences that were hurtful … but as you say, the only consolation is that we are all here trying to do the best we can with what we know. And way more often we know less than more.

    Thanks for being real. It gives me permission to face my realness too.

    Love,
    Sheri
    PS-and because we are indeed all connected, I would like to apologize for the pain I have knowingly and unknowingly caused others that has inadvertently hurt you, a member of my whole. I’m trying to remember the higher ground exists and it’s where I should try and live more often.

  3. You’re an amazing person . And it’s so much deeper than that . But this is only part of what terrifies me: that anger . That need to make the other person wrong . You could have shook that off and kept driving . And hate . So strong, so unnecessary . You’re young 🙂 one day you’ll want peace too, you won’t just say it.

    • I’m not exactly sure what you’re saying. But it sounds like you’re implying that one day I’ll do more than just talk about peace.

      • What do I know? Except one day , you might piss off the wrong person. Just sayin’.You’re a good writer. You have heart. Keep growing, learning, loving, being open. I wish you well. Rb

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